The creator is a powerful archetype who helps us to understand that we all actively create our lives. The words we use, the thoughts we think and our beliefs all contribute to the path we are on.
We can’t NOT create. We are always creating, whether it is consciously or unconsciously.
When the creator is strong in us we have many ideas and possibilities, and these ideas just flow from us. I have had times when the creator is prominent in my life and I will keep coming up with new possibilities, some practical and doable, but many not. But I certainly feel energized and alive during those times!
Maybe you are a person who is traditionally artistic: you draw, write, compose music, paint etc. Or you are a gardener, decorator, make up artist, photographer, or designer. There are many many ways to be artistic and to use our talents.
Ask yourself when the times were in your life when you felt very creative and productive. What would you like to create next in your life? Even when the destroyer has made a shamble of your life, know that the creator is there also, and whenever the destroyer gets rid of something in our life, the creator is there also, to help us recreate ourselves.
By thinking about and focusing our attention on what we DO want in our lives, we help to create the space/energy for that to happen. So daydream for a few minutes about the future and what you want to see happen- what would your “perfect” day look like?
Remember we are creating whether we think we are or not! So choose good stuff!
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
The Destroyer
The destroyer archetype sounds frightening, but a deeper look at it lets us know it is and can be an ally.
The destroyer teaches us that all things must end. Our bodies’ age, relationships sour, we leave jobs, our pets die, children leave home, friendships end, etc. In our culture we often fail to acknowledge death until we are forced to. But an awareness of death can help us to see what is truly important to us and where our priorities need to be.
The destroyer has been strong in my life lately, from the recent death of my beloved dog, to relationships and jobs ending. The feelings of loss have been profound and I hope time will ease this.
The destroyer gets encountered whenever we experience a death or loss. For some of us this happens at a young age, and others don’t experience significant loss until midlife. But without exception, we all will face the destroyer eventually.
Illness, divorce, natural or manmade disasters, financial upheaval, death and other losses cause us to go face to face with the destroyer. The destroyer can come from outside of us or within us. If it comes from outside of us, we feel powerless and victimized.
So how can the destroyer come from within? When we make the choice to have endings, whether that be a relationship, job, or ending a project that is no longer satisfying we are consciously choosing the destroyer.
Do not deny the pain and grief of loss- give yourself the time and space to fully experience it.
Using the destroyer as an ally, ask it, what beliefs do I need to give up that no longer serve me? What relationships should come to an end? What old ways or addictions should I let go of? These are powerful questions to ask and to see the destroyer as a friend and guide.
Do not be afraid of the destroyer- it is a part of life! And, there is no avoiding all the little deaths we experience before our “big” death.
But, along with destruction and death, comes creation and life. The life/death/life cycle informs us of this¸ and the next archetype I will write about is the creator.
The destroyer teaches us that all things must end. Our bodies’ age, relationships sour, we leave jobs, our pets die, children leave home, friendships end, etc. In our culture we often fail to acknowledge death until we are forced to. But an awareness of death can help us to see what is truly important to us and where our priorities need to be.
The destroyer has been strong in my life lately, from the recent death of my beloved dog, to relationships and jobs ending. The feelings of loss have been profound and I hope time will ease this.
The destroyer gets encountered whenever we experience a death or loss. For some of us this happens at a young age, and others don’t experience significant loss until midlife. But without exception, we all will face the destroyer eventually.
Illness, divorce, natural or manmade disasters, financial upheaval, death and other losses cause us to go face to face with the destroyer. The destroyer can come from outside of us or within us. If it comes from outside of us, we feel powerless and victimized.
So how can the destroyer come from within? When we make the choice to have endings, whether that be a relationship, job, or ending a project that is no longer satisfying we are consciously choosing the destroyer.
Do not deny the pain and grief of loss- give yourself the time and space to fully experience it.
Using the destroyer as an ally, ask it, what beliefs do I need to give up that no longer serve me? What relationships should come to an end? What old ways or addictions should I let go of? These are powerful questions to ask and to see the destroyer as a friend and guide.
Do not be afraid of the destroyer- it is a part of life! And, there is no avoiding all the little deaths we experience before our “big” death.
But, along with destruction and death, comes creation and life. The life/death/life cycle informs us of this¸ and the next archetype I will write about is the creator.
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Being introverted is not a disease
I am an introvert, and I get tired of hearing from some psychological research that extroverts are healthier and happier than introverts, and that we should encourage extroversion in ourselves and our children.
Are relationships important? Yes.
But so is the relationship with ourselves, which is what introverts excel at.
I love extroverts, and am thankfully married to one, but the idea that gets permeated that introverts are social misfits, unhappy at that, gets tiring.
The myths of introversion: 1. They don't have social skills. Wrong! They just don't need to talk a lot and tend to be OK with quiet. I have good social skills, and I am introverted. I have been called stand offish at times by others, but usually that means that I am overstimulated. 2. Introverts aren't as happy as extroverts. We all need relationships, and as long as an introvert has some close relationships in their life- that is all they need to meet their social needs. They don't need the constant social interaction to feel happy. 3. Introverts are neurotic. Well, they do tend to think about themselves and their relationships a lot, but that could also be emotional intelligence!
Introverts make up around 25% of the population and they tend to have a rich inner life, need time alone to recharge, and like small groups of people to interact with. They like to be alone and seldom get bored with their own company. They do like people and their relationships are very important to them, but they don't need a lot of relationships- a few close friends is perfect.
Being introverted is not a bad thing. Embrace that place inside you that likes your own company!
Are relationships important? Yes.
But so is the relationship with ourselves, which is what introverts excel at.
I love extroverts, and am thankfully married to one, but the idea that gets permeated that introverts are social misfits, unhappy at that, gets tiring.
The myths of introversion: 1. They don't have social skills. Wrong! They just don't need to talk a lot and tend to be OK with quiet. I have good social skills, and I am introverted. I have been called stand offish at times by others, but usually that means that I am overstimulated. 2. Introverts aren't as happy as extroverts. We all need relationships, and as long as an introvert has some close relationships in their life- that is all they need to meet their social needs. They don't need the constant social interaction to feel happy. 3. Introverts are neurotic. Well, they do tend to think about themselves and their relationships a lot, but that could also be emotional intelligence!
Introverts make up around 25% of the population and they tend to have a rich inner life, need time alone to recharge, and like small groups of people to interact with. They like to be alone and seldom get bored with their own company. They do like people and their relationships are very important to them, but they don't need a lot of relationships- a few close friends is perfect.
Being introverted is not a bad thing. Embrace that place inside you that likes your own company!
Thursday, July 22, 2010
The Lover
The lover is a powerful archetype that tends to first be encountered as a late teen/early adult. It teaches us to connect with others, with ideas, vocations, children, art, the earth, etc.
This archetype invokes passion and sensuality in us and others; it awakens sexual feelings. If the lover is strong in your life, you like the feeling of being “in love” and search it out, either with one partner or many.
The lovers attention differs from the caregiver in that the caregiver wants to help others (sometimes save them) and the lover treats others as peers/equals.
Someone with strong lover energy tends to be romantic and think that love solves everything. Sometimes they are seen as having their head in the clouds by others more practical and pessimistic.
Experiencing the lover can be transformative. It teaches us to love and honor ourselves, others and the earth. In its higher stages, the lover can teach us to connect to a higher power.
Questions to ask yourself: When have you fallen in love? Are you in love with someone or something right now? How much do you enjoy your sensuality? Who do you know that expresses a lot of lover in their life?
This archetype invokes passion and sensuality in us and others; it awakens sexual feelings. If the lover is strong in your life, you like the feeling of being “in love” and search it out, either with one partner or many.
The lovers attention differs from the caregiver in that the caregiver wants to help others (sometimes save them) and the lover treats others as peers/equals.
Someone with strong lover energy tends to be romantic and think that love solves everything. Sometimes they are seen as having their head in the clouds by others more practical and pessimistic.
Experiencing the lover can be transformative. It teaches us to love and honor ourselves, others and the earth. In its higher stages, the lover can teach us to connect to a higher power.
Questions to ask yourself: When have you fallen in love? Are you in love with someone or something right now? How much do you enjoy your sensuality? Who do you know that expresses a lot of lover in their life?
Sunday, July 18, 2010
The Seeker
We yearn for something, but we don’t know what it is. We feel discontent, and think “there has to be more than what is in front of me”.
This may happen in adolescence, early adulthood, after being married for a few years, and any time during our life. The seeker can grab us at any age. We move, join groups, have children, travel, join a commune, start college, divorce, explore a new religion, deepen our spirituality- all ways we encounter the seeker. Often it is because our environment feels to confining in some way.
Ah, but the seeker has a shadow side, as do all the archetypes. We become addicted to newness, drugs, excitement, sex, and can’t commit to anything. We change major after major, unable to settle in to one major. We continuously try on new ideas and ventures, but never really experience them in their fullness because we quit too soon and move on to the next excitement. We stay in relationships only so long- once the newness wears off, we move on. Any addiction can be seen as the shadow side of the seeker.
An example from my own life of the positive side of the seeker is when I had quit college and on a whim moved to New York State. I had felt very dissatisfied with community college and felt stuck. Living nine months in New York satisfied my boredom, and I got myself back into college, after working as a grocery clerk, for low wage and low respect!
I have seen people move from job to job and career to career, never able to commit and become a master at one. I know that can be a good thing to explore career options, but if we are always feel discontent, we may be expecting our job to fulfill too many of our needs, that are best met in other areas of our life.
The seeker can be a wonderful ally, especially as we develop ourselves spiritually.
This may happen in adolescence, early adulthood, after being married for a few years, and any time during our life. The seeker can grab us at any age. We move, join groups, have children, travel, join a commune, start college, divorce, explore a new religion, deepen our spirituality- all ways we encounter the seeker. Often it is because our environment feels to confining in some way.
Ah, but the seeker has a shadow side, as do all the archetypes. We become addicted to newness, drugs, excitement, sex, and can’t commit to anything. We change major after major, unable to settle in to one major. We continuously try on new ideas and ventures, but never really experience them in their fullness because we quit too soon and move on to the next excitement. We stay in relationships only so long- once the newness wears off, we move on. Any addiction can be seen as the shadow side of the seeker.
An example from my own life of the positive side of the seeker is when I had quit college and on a whim moved to New York State. I had felt very dissatisfied with community college and felt stuck. Living nine months in New York satisfied my boredom, and I got myself back into college, after working as a grocery clerk, for low wage and low respect!
I have seen people move from job to job and career to career, never able to commit and become a master at one. I know that can be a good thing to explore career options, but if we are always feel discontent, we may be expecting our job to fulfill too many of our needs, that are best met in other areas of our life.
The seeker can be a wonderful ally, especially as we develop ourselves spiritually.
Monday, July 12, 2010
The caregiver
The caregiver within knows how to love and care for others. Although the caregiver has traditionally been seen as a women's role and the warrior a males role, we ALL need aspects of the caregiver and the warrior inside of us.
We are called to the caregiver by seeing another in need. The positive qualities of the caregiver are easy to see: warm, loving, concern and care. Hopefully all our parents embody some form of the caregiver because that makes a solid foundation for our young selves.
As with all archetypes, caregiver has a dark side also. It can be martyrdom and controlling behaviors. It can be a way to get our own needs met, by guilting others into doing what we think they should do. Some women over identify with the caregiver and believe that they have worth only in caring for others, and put their own needs aside repeatedly.
How strong is the caregiver in you? Has it changed throughout the years? Do you need more or less caregiver qualities? Who do you know that embodies the caregiver?
We are called to the caregiver by seeing another in need. The positive qualities of the caregiver are easy to see: warm, loving, concern and care. Hopefully all our parents embody some form of the caregiver because that makes a solid foundation for our young selves.
As with all archetypes, caregiver has a dark side also. It can be martyrdom and controlling behaviors. It can be a way to get our own needs met, by guilting others into doing what we think they should do. Some women over identify with the caregiver and believe that they have worth only in caring for others, and put their own needs aside repeatedly.
How strong is the caregiver in you? Has it changed throughout the years? Do you need more or less caregiver qualities? Who do you know that embodies the caregiver?
Monday, July 5, 2010
The Warrior
The warrior archetype is misunderstood by many. It helps us to establish and protect our boundaries, right injustice and defend the less able. The warrior helps us to have courage in the face of opposition and to have integrity.
As a warrior if we rely too heavily on the hero/victim plot we can become engaged in battle after battle. Sometimes we do need to stand up to tyranny, but there are other ways to have the warrior expressed in your life.
A low level expression of the warrior is to gain power and control over others. “My needs and desires matter the most and I will do whatever to make them happen.” A few examples of this are the tyrannical boss, abusive spouse, or bully. From our culture some examples of low level warrior expression are: Darth Vader, Al Pacino in the Godfather,
In order to repress our orphaning, some people become ‘pseudo-warriors” because they have their own sense of powerlessness and they try and control others in order to feel they have power.
Our inner warrior develops because our orphan is looking for someone or something to defend it. Historically as women, we have looked outside ourselves for the warrior energy, as men have typically looked outside themselves for the caregiver archetype. Many women have not been shown or given the OK to express their warrior and to have firm boundaries- to say yes to this, and no to that. Helping our daughters to establish their boundaries is a great first step in helping them to access their warrior energy.
A high level of warrior energy allows win win situations to develop. They have a deep understanding of their own and others desires, and they command respect from others due to their leadership skills. They have high integrity, and eventually ask “what is right for all concerned?”.
Establish boundaries, understand your preferences, help those who don’t have a voice, assert yourself, ask for what you need, defend your values; these are all ways to access your inner warrior.
As a warrior if we rely too heavily on the hero/victim plot we can become engaged in battle after battle. Sometimes we do need to stand up to tyranny, but there are other ways to have the warrior expressed in your life.
A low level expression of the warrior is to gain power and control over others. “My needs and desires matter the most and I will do whatever to make them happen.” A few examples of this are the tyrannical boss, abusive spouse, or bully. From our culture some examples of low level warrior expression are: Darth Vader, Al Pacino in the Godfather,
In order to repress our orphaning, some people become ‘pseudo-warriors” because they have their own sense of powerlessness and they try and control others in order to feel they have power.
Our inner warrior develops because our orphan is looking for someone or something to defend it. Historically as women, we have looked outside ourselves for the warrior energy, as men have typically looked outside themselves for the caregiver archetype. Many women have not been shown or given the OK to express their warrior and to have firm boundaries- to say yes to this, and no to that. Helping our daughters to establish their boundaries is a great first step in helping them to access their warrior energy.
A high level of warrior energy allows win win situations to develop. They have a deep understanding of their own and others desires, and they command respect from others due to their leadership skills. They have high integrity, and eventually ask “what is right for all concerned?”.
Establish boundaries, understand your preferences, help those who don’t have a voice, assert yourself, ask for what you need, defend your values; these are all ways to access your inner warrior.
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